Second chances

Recently a friend let me know that someone didn’t like me. LOL, jump in line. In this case, it was someone that I haven’t seen or been around since my early 30s. Then I got to thinking about it and found myself agreeing. Hell, if I met me in my early 30s, I wouldn’t like me either. No, I’m actually serious. 

Second chances, or the act of giving someone a second opportunity to make things right, is a concept that has been around for centuries. It is a widely accepted notion that recognizes the potential for growth and change in individuals. However, some people are often hesitant to give a second chance, fearing the possibility of being hurt or disappointed again. Despite these fears, it is imperative that we recognize the importance of second chances, not just for others, but for ourselves as well.

Ahh, second chances for ourselves. I believe this one is very important. There are times that we make mistakes, and for years we hold onto it. We expect others to forgive and/or forget, but we can’t do it ourselves. Remember this: We are not our worst mistake. 

Getting a second chance allows us to learn from mistakes that we made. We all make mistakes, and it's crucial we have the opportunity to correct them and become better versions of ourselves. When someone's given a second chance, it shows they're not judged by their past actions, but instead are valued for their present efforts to improve. This can lead to the person feeling a sense of trust and support, which can motivate them to push harder and work towards a brighter future.

Second chances promote forgiveness and empathy, two qualities that are key to building strong relationships. When we offer second chances, we demonstrate we're willing to understand their perspective and give them the benefit of the doubt. I believe that at some point, we've all been given a second chance with something. When given the chance, people can learn from their mistakes, become better individuals, and make a difference in the lives of others.

You have the opportunity to pay forward the gesture of kindness by giving someone a second chance to help themselves and others. 

What’s crazy is how bad I am at giving second chances. You’d think that I wouldn’t need as much work on this, but I believe I need the most work. I'll strive to be better at this because I’ve had a few people give me a second shot. Sometimes all it takes is just one person who believes in us and offers us a second chance to help us turn our lives around. Because of the blessings and understanding of others, I believe my life has changed. 

Oh, and to the person that shared they didn’t like me to a friend of mine, just know...looking back, I agree with you. 

Until next time,

Gee Scott Sr.

Hello, my handsome nephew

Remember your first set of friends growing up? Mine just so happened to be my cousins. Derrell and Daniel were my best friends. When I was about five years old and my dad would say, “Hey, we are gonna go to Derrell and Daniel’s house”, it was the equivalent of going to Disneyland. I can’t remember what I ate for lunch yesterday, but I can remember going to my cousin’s house at a really young age. Derrell was one year older, and Daniel was one year younger than me. My grandmother (Mama Scott) lived there, along with my Aunt Darlene (Derell and Daniel’s Mom). This was on the Southside of Chicago in a complex called Parkway Gardens. It’s gone now, but back in the early 80s there was a seesaw out front that I loved.

One of the main reasons I loved going over there is because of my Aunt Darlene. Ahh, she was (still is) the most beautiful woman. I’m telling you; she would walk in any room and would command attention. I don’t remember eating anything but fried chicken when I was there. Let me be specific…she would make me chicken wings, and always tell me how handsome I was, and how much she loved me. To this day when I have chicken wings, I think about Aunt Darlene.

My heart goes out to any of you that have lost loved ones due to drugs. I’m sure it’s not easy. My hope and prayer is that there is a dramatic increase in drug treatment facilities. Individuals struggling with addiction need access to quality treatment programs. PERIOD! While we treat those that are fighting, we also need to improve education. There needs to be more education about the harms and risks of drugs, and I’m not talking about the one annual school assembly. It needs to be put into our school curriculum. There has always been a battle (war) on the supply, but not on the demand. We address the demand by more education.

Here we are present day and one of the problems that exist in our country is our drug problem. According to the CDC, drug overdose deaths rose from 38,329 in 2010 to 70,237 in 2017 and has remained steady through 2019. Then, in 2020 we saw a significant increase with 91,799 reported deaths.

From 1968-2020, 1,106,859 have died from drug overdose in the United States. Wait, how does that happen? President Nixon declared a War on Drugs in 1971, so you’d think we wouldn’t have the problem that we have today.

Let’s check the receipts. In 1972 there were 6,622 overdose deaths. Then in 1980 there were 2,492 overdose deaths. That’s when the increase continues. So, if there was a War on Drugs, why didn’t that stop the problem? Well let’s look up what the word “War” means.

War: a state of usually open and declared armed hostile conflict between states or nations

: a period of such armed conflict

: weapons and equipment for war

: a state of hostility, conflict, or antagonism

: a struggle or competition between opposing forces or for a particular end

So was the war on the problem, or was the war on the people? I’ll let you answer that. Also, what is it about war that brings in so much money? The US spent $56B a year, spending over $1T in 50 years. All that money spent, and we are really slim with the amount of drug treatment services in this country. Then I hear folks say, “Well why don’t they get help?” Well, most of the time it’s financial reasons, stigma, and sometimes geographic location.

Another problem is how outdated we are with the discussion centered around drugs. For the most part we are still repeating what Nancy Regan said, “Just say no!” Yeah, so how’s that working? It’s not. And for over 50 years, the inaction by our Federal Government has us where we are today.

Drug treatment shouldn’t just be accessible to those that are financially able. Drugs touches all of us, whether we use drugs or not --our family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, or acquaintances.

Let me take this time to apologize right now. I’m sure some of my family will be upset with this next part, but this is what’s on my heart. If you’ve listened to me on the radio, then you’ve heard my stance on this drug issue. What you don’t know is why I speak on it this way.

I never saw my aunt use drugs. I was a kid, so how would I know? Well, I knew by listening to what adults were saying. It must have been pretty bad cause anytime I would hear her name, it was always connected to discussion about drugs. Back then it was crack.

I was really confused though. I was confused because every time I would see her, she would always say, “Hello, my handsome nephew.” I always felt so much love. As a matter of fact, I remember she was dating this guy by the name of Derek. He worked on the radio. Well one night he said the names of my cousin and I, and I thought that was soooo cool! Maybe the seed was planted then that one day I would be on radio myself.

Through her addiction, she still loved everyone. That was my lesson on drug addiction. Sure, there’s a drug addiction, but inside there’s still a beautiful soul. A soul that’s fighting something that needs so much help.

I speak passionately about this for the love of my Aunt Darlene. Do you know that no matter what, she makes sure to text me on my birthday? And she was the first to text me this year.

I will continue to use my platform to help with the drug problem in this country, and I will also use my platform to remind my Aunt Darlene how much I love her. You are still the most beautiful woman in the world, and I love your heart. I know you love me and everyone else auntie.

Until next time,

Gee Scott Sr.

Bro, nice ride!

I spent evenings going to hang out with friends as long as I could until it was time to turn in for the night. There was a Dick's Drive-In right next to the apartments that I would park my vehicle at. I would usually order one Dick’s Deluxe, 5-6 cheeseburgers, and fries. Bet you’re thinking about how much I was eating huh? Well, food was my addiction. Food is how I would cope. If I thought drugs would have been better, I would have tried that. That’s just it. When you’re unhoused, you’re not exactly in a good place…so doing things to keep your mind off reality is a great possibility. So, the next time you see someone unhoused that might be addicted to drugs, remember how I was addicted to food. Addiction is when you’re dependent on a particular substance, thing, or activity. What we are addicted to is subjective, and hopefully whatever it is, we can get a hold of it before it continues to spiral.

So how did I get there? Well, there’s a lot of reasons, but ultimately, decisions that were made left me close to the edge until I fell. One minute life was one way, and the next it was another. I’d love to throw in depression here, but I had no idea that I was depressed. I just figured that I was a loser and my life would continue to spiral. I’d love to blame the Great Recession, but most people I knew weren’t unhoused during that time, so what was wrong with me? I was clueless and just about done with it all.

Before I go further, I want to explain to you that I better understand 14 years later. Folks who are living in poverty can struggle to afford even basic necessities like food, let alone the cost of housing.

So many in this country are one missed paycheck away from being unhoused. Many individuals and families find themselves unable to pay rent or mortgage payments, leading to homelessness.

Advocacy and policy change are also essential for addressing the systemic issues that contribute to homelessness, income inequality and the lack of affordable housing. With the little money that I was making during that time, I couldn’t afford a down payment for an apartment. Even if I did have the money, by then I didn’t have the credit.

When you think of someone being unhoused, what do they look like to you? I’m sure you have a visual of the folks that you see, but this blog today is about those that you don’t see. I was one that you didn’t see. By day I was driving this vehicle, and this was where I laid my head at night. I received so many compliments on this car. I specifically remember one night at Dick’s before going to lay it down; these teenagers said to me, “Bro, nice ride!” I’m sure those words got me through the night. Even at your lowest, kind words can be powerful.

Now let’s talk about the many people in this country that are on the verge of homelessness. So many don’t qualify for the help that’s needed to sustain housing until they are without housing. I still have a hard time understanding that. LET’S HELP FOLKS BEFORE THEY ARE UNHOUSED!! Sorry for yelling there, just got a little emotional. So, no matter how much money is spent to address those that are unhoused, there’s more on the way. Why? Because there’s a HOLE IN THE BOAT!! We keep scooping water out with buckets (addressing homelessness), but there’s a hole in the boat (income inequality, unaffordable housing, medical debt, student loan debt). So, my goal right now isn’t for you to read this and find the answers. Truthfully, I don’t have them. However, I do want you to come away with a better understanding that for every person that you see unhoused, there’s even more that you don’t see. It could be a family member, a close friend, or even a co-worker. Being unhoused is not exactly something that you brag about.

I want you to remember the next time you see a person that might see that ha have an addiction---remember what my addiction was. I also want you to know that even though there’s help that’s provided through non-profit organizations, government, and others, that’s not always the answer. Former NFL player Rob Sims gave me a place to stay. I was able to stay rent free for over a year. Even with all of that help, I still struggled. I remember one day being in tears on the couch. Rob came in and asked what was up. I told him that I was tired of being a failure. I’ll never forget what he said. He said, “Bro, it’s not always gonna be this way. Watch, you’re gonna rise up. I believe in you.”

Rob could have given me $10K to just leave and be out if his house. Instead, he let me live rent free and reminded me that he believed in me. That felt like a $1M. I’ll forever be grateful to Rob, and without him, I’d imagine food wouldn’t have been the only thing I would have stayed addicted to… who knows… glad I’ll never know, to be honest.

In conclusion, homelessness is a complex and ongoing social issue that affects millions of people worldwide. To effectively address this problem, we must work together to identify and address the root causes of homelessness, increase access to affordable housing and healthcare, and advocate for policy changes that prioritize the well-being of all individuals, regardless of their socioeconomic status. Only when we work together can we hope to create a world where homelessness is no longer a devastating social issue. Let’s start with how we talk about it. They are someone. They are people. There are/were loved. They deserve empathy. No matter what we believe. Maybe they don’t have a Rob like I did, but the energy of more love towards them really can’t hurt. 

Until next time,

Gee Scott Sr.

The Moment

What if right now is exactly where you’re supposed to be?

A couple weeks ago I had the honor of auctioneering the Friends of Odessa Brown Children’s Clinic annual live auction fundraiser.

I was listening to and hearing about the great things that the clinic does...when it hit me. On the weekends I have the opportunity to work with incredible organizations doing things in our communities, while filling some of the gaps that government can’t. So, the help they provide was at one time the bell that I needed. Sometimes we believe that needing help is a sign of failure. When it happened to me years ago, I was too proud to be transparent about what I was really going through. I felt alone. And though I didn’t get help from an organization, I did get help from others. It was that help that propelled me to reach new heights. It was the help that lifted me -- but it was the struggle that I went through that helps me sustain today. They say on the other side of struggle is success. I say on the other side of help is understanding. Understanding more -- that no matter who you are -- help at some point is something we all need.

Even if you believe that you’re not where you’re supposed to be, please know that struggle doesn’t equal failure. The moment that you realize you’re not alone, and that it’s OK to sometimes ask for help, that’s when you will really understand you’re more than capable.

Until next time,

Gee Scott Sr.